A Season of Thanksgiving.

Well, we’re just finished a busy year. We celebrated my mother’s 80^th birthday and Thanksgiving in the same week. It’s been like that this year. Time really does fly when you’re not paying attention.

TJ and some of her friends made a thanksgiving feast at our house while the rest of the fam celebrated at Jack & Annie’s. That was interesting. Then we came home and watched Transformers II with her friends. I forgot how strange that movie was. TJ’s still looking for work, and that can be a little discouraging.

Corrie is a married woman, and is back in Germany. She & I are trying to negotiate some complicated German paperwork to get some financial aid for her & her husband Dani. He’s studying engineering; she’s studying architecture, and they’re both running pretty hard. Corrie isn’t getting nearly as much “alone time” as she has been used to; I’m concerned that that’s wearing her out. And she’s fighting a bug that’s hanging on. And of course, there are one or two adjustments that come with a new marriage.

Sue preached (well, “shared”) at church last week. Was an out-of-the-ballpark hit, and folks have been asking for some of her notes and her declarations to use themselves. I teach every so often at the RT School of Supernatural Living. It always stretches me, but I really enjoy it. We both like making a difference in people’s lives, I guess.

Sue’s also looking for work. Her old job (as a “temp” for 5 years) has been posted, and she obviously has an inside track toward that, but it’s certainly not a guarantee. Still looking. Still looking. We’re thankful for her unemployment check. We’re tight, but surviving. Everybody’s making homemade gifts this Christmas. That’s actually kind of fun, though it seems to be working better for TJ & Sue than for me.

My work is challenging. Fewer people, more to do, less compensation for it. I really love my job (I see myself as a contracted Tech Director for ten thousand churches. I’m glad I don’t have to go to all those staff meetings!), but I’m getting a little frazzled. On the other hand, I have a job. That’s good. I like my job. That’s even better. I’m not complaining.

We've been working on the skylight still. We're very happy that it isn't leaking even a little bit! Another place in the roof has been though. It's been raining like crazy over here, but I think we got that fixed. We’ll see next rainstorm.

We finally had the bright idea to get help from Rex Roney to help with the floor where the fireplace once stood. That man is amazing. Once that is done, we'll get a beam up to hold things (like the ceiling) where they ought to be. My dad says that the ceiling is engineered to be self supporting, so it shouldn't be too big a load. Then we can finish out the space and take down the plastic. I have learned that I’m not real fond of sheet rock mud in weird angles and oddly textured places. Sigh.

Sue’s mom is still amazing us. She’s ninety something and still at home, and pretty much alone. She does get a hot meal from Meals on Wheels every day, and that’s probably making the difference. It’s a little ironic that one of the people that she relies on the most is Dave’s mom.

It’s been a good season. But I probably ought to acknowledge that these things bring lots of pressures: individual stress, interpersonal challenges, new obstacles. Great fun, yes?

And there’s lots to pray for, if you feel so inclined. Thanks for caring!

March 2009

So we haven’t posted any updates here for a while; we’ve been trying to stay in touch with folks via Facebook (find me by searching for admclain@gmail.com; find Sue in my Friends list). But updates on this blog are helpful as well; I always admire my daughter’s faithfulness in writing her newsletters. Apologies for the silence.

So what’s going on? Here’s the short version:

• Corrie is still in Germany (sigh), is learning lots (yay), and is dating a young German man named Daniel (mixed emotions here, but I think “yay!”).
• Josiah is still in college, of course.
• TJ is still at home. She divides her time between her craftwork (very cool), volunteering at the Library (cool), looking for work (yay) and being bored (yay). We really enjoy living with her.
• Sue is still working ¾ time for the Department of Revenue (yay). She has applied for a full-time and permanent position, and then they hit the latest hiring freeze.
• I (David) am still working at CCI (yay), where we’re working extra hard because of our lovely economy; I’m teaching more (love it) at Revival Town.
• We have a wonderful new cat named Mia who rules us with grace and humor.

We’ve been fighting a flu bug this winter, far more than any other year; all of us have missed work with it, Sue & I more than the kids. We really aren’t pleased with this! Sue, TJ & I are working our way out of the most recent round.

We inherited a car from Sue’s brother-in-law a year and a half ago; we think we might be able to actually take possession of it in the next few months. Talk about a lesson in patience.

Speaking of patience, we’re finding ourselves in a season of Proverbs 3:5&6 (outlined here), focusing on the phrase, “Do not lean on your own understanding.” I’m being confronted with how much I have trusted my experience and knowledge of how God does stuff (eg “my own understanding”), and how different that is from actually trusting Him. Quite the adventure.

Along those lines, Sue & I are finding ourselves more challenged in our “moving forward” this year. I’m hoping that Sue’s leading of a “worship and testimony” night at church recently (which was wonderful!) will prove to be the start of a new trend; she has a real gift in leading worship. I mentioned I’m teaching more, and that will no doubt continue while our church’s team leader is on sabbatical.

In addition, I’m planning a “home group training workshop” for later this spring. It will be for leaders, proto-leaders, hopeful leaders, and non-leaders, and I’m looking forward to it with some trembling. Talk about “leaning not on my own understanding!

Sue’s mom is still going strong. She’s still 93, she’s still living at home, mostly on her own (I helped her interview a new once-a-week caregiver this weekend.), and she still has strong opinions. Her world is getting smaller, but I expect her to hit 100 years old, which is another “yay!”

Blessings y’all!

January 19th: The Pressure is Increased

Again, thanks for your prayers anew. Today, I’d like to ask for your prayers for my mother-in-law, Janet (aka “Grandma B”). We (and by “we” I mostly mean “Sue”) have repented. We realized that we had overstepped our authority in her life: we’ve been pressing forward for the reverse mortgage (which we still believe she desperately needs), taking initiative that belongs to her.

We have stopped that. Last night, we visited with Janet, and explained that it is her decision to live at home, and she is capable of making decisions, and has indicated that she wanted to make this one, so we were leaving it in her hands. We will help; we will not do it for her. She was grateful: there were happy tears and hugs all around, and that part was good. There was a sense of relief on all sides.

She quickly grasped that now she needs to come up with a solution (instead of depending on her daughter to come up with a solution, which she would then oppose), and also grasped that she didn’t have the resources to pay her caregivers.

The good news is that she’s getting stronger: she can get out of her bed, she can get into her wheelchair, and get around. There is food (rather a lot of food) in her refrigerator which she can reach.

The bad news is that her caregivers – knowing that they haven’t been paid for a while and now learning that they wouldn’t be paid for a longer while – have stopped working for her, and have left for jobs that include paychecks. Janet is now on her own. This is fresh news, so we don’t know how she feels about it; Sue is freaking out. She wants to take responsibility for her mom, but knows that she can’t (or at least mustn’t) and she shouldn’t, and there’s a great conflict in her.

We love Grandma B – we really do! – but we must let her make her own decisions, and yet we must also help her without rescuing her. And it would be best if we survived in the process.

In the midst of all this, we have some other fun and exciting things going on. Josiah had just gotten a dream job (barista at our favorite coffee shop near home) and found a car he wants to buy; but the shop just closed, and now he’s looking for work, really looking for the first time. And this weekend, I start co-teaching a prophecy class to a group of gifted individuals from several churches: I’m terribly excited and not just a little intimidated. And TJ is facing some challenges with school that may threaten her graduating with the rest of her class: there are some classes that she’s been taking online that are having challenges, so we’re waiting for books in order to finish the classes.

God warned us that a season like this was coming. The prophetic word said, “I’m going to begin the repotting, re-rooting, re-pruning process so that you can grow into what I need for you to be in order to accomplish my purpose and destiny,” and “You might tell some people around you, “If we get ugly, love us for a while.” Because when God does a process like that, you get ugly for a little while.” I guess we’re getting ugly for a while. Thanks for loving us!

So if you’d pray for Janet and Sue and for our family, I’d appreciate it. Our number one prayer is “God, please accomplish your plans in our family,” but prayers for wisdom, humility, grace, diligence, courage, a job and the like are not out of line! :-)

You’re terrific! Thanks!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year! I’m counting on 2008 being an interesting year!

Thanks for your prayers again! It looks like our need for them is ramping up again, particularly in relationship with Sue’s mom, and how Sue’s handling the very substantial stress on that account.

“Grandma B” is unable to live on her own: she can’t get out of bed, use the restroom, or make her own meals by herself. She’s chosen thus far to live at home with caretakers. It’s expensive, really expensive, but good care at a high quality home would be in the same ballpark. She’s exhausted all of her money paying the caretakers; she’s a little stronger, physically, which makes her think she’ll be “all better” real shortly. It appears that she may have been having a series of small strokes which makes progress difficult, as does being 92 years old!

The only choices before her now are to sell her house and move into a nursing home, or to get a reverse mortgage, use the proceeds to pay her in-home care, and continue to live at home. (Obviously, there are limits on how long those funds will last; that’s a concern, but for another day.)

She steadfastly refuses to move to a home, which is fine, except she has convinced herself that she can not or should not consider a reverse mortgage either. That leaves her the option of living on her own, and there are two problems with that: 1) she can’t live on her own. 2) we’ve already been informed by elder-care advocates that if she does attempt to live on her own, they are legally required to report her as “at risk” and “unsafe”, and at that point, the state steps in, and she loses all say in the matter: she will be moved to a nursing home (we are told) against her will.

Since we don’t want her in a home against her will, we’re moving forward with the reverse mortgage; we should have done it a month ago, when she was in favor of it. Now she is not; she’s angry, hurt, confused. Did I say “angry”? Boy howdy. She’s making completely baseless accusations against everyone, she has disowned Sue & me (again), declaring “I have no daughter!” She’s seeing the attorney this week, we presume to change her will (again). As you might imagine, it’s tough to take. Yeah, she’s in a tough place, but her confusion and her choices (past and present) are making it much worse than it needs to be.

So Sue & I are dealing with stress-induced challenges in great quantity. We hurt physically, emotionally, and some other “ally”s.

This is going to sound funny: we’re also working on finding our place in the church in this community. We stopped attending our church (GloryHouse: cool place) at what we believe was God’s instruction. Hindsight would support that conclusion; we could not have coped with our past several months had we still carried those responsibilities, and we’re too strong-willed to lay it down when times are tough.

We feel that God has not called us out of one Sunday morning gathering in order to plug into another, so we’re looking at non-standard models. We’ll explore house church, home groups, and other Revolutionary options. We’ll definitely stay in relationship with church – with several of them in fact – but probably not become members of any. In fact, it looks like I’ll be teaching at a couple of congregations in the next several weeks. Sue & I are hoping to be on the SOZO ministry team with one church. If you’re needy, sometimes it’s good to give; we hope to practice that.

Oddly perhaps, in the midst of all of this, we’re observing that our marriage is growing stronger; our hands-on relationship with God is also growing stronger. We see this as (in Paul’s words) “light and momentary trials” that lead to greater things, and we find ourselves excited. Pretty cool: we limp, but we dance with that limp!

Please pray for Grandma B (“Janet”): for clarity, for understanding, for peace, for trust, for whatever else you can think of. She’s in a tough place. Please pray for our health: physically, emotionally, relationally, psychologically, spiritually (let’s see, what else is there?) You might also pray for both of our finances: Janet’s and ours; this whole process has been very costly.

Thanks again for your prayers!

David

Merry Christmas All!

It’s been perhaps the strangest Christmas season ever, but "different" is good, yes? And I love remembering the birth of heaven – in the person of Jesus – on earth; is that cool, or what! We miss Corrie (our first Christmas without her; she’s celebrating in Germany), and our “kids” aren’t so “kid” any more. Has anyone told you they grow up quickly? Dang!

We’re still in transition, of course. The number of crises is down: Charlie’s estate is more or less closed; we’re just waiting on some paperwork on title transfer of the car. The tree on the house is pretty much done; we’re just negotiating with the insurance company about how much they’re going to pay us, but it’ll still work out OK. In fact, the insurance money may cover the cost of Charlie’s estate, and that would be cool.

I’m losing my assistant at work (Beth is taking a job in massage therapy: she has a license, and she’s ready for it!), and our Sue & I are feeling like our grace to be “in transition” about church is running out, so we’re expecting a change on that front as well. We’re building great relationships with several churches in the area. Please keep praying for GloryHouse; it seems like there’s some tough stuff going on there.

May your 2008 be more than you have hoped for, and may your challenges with 2007 be gone, except for the lessons and foundations they’ve left for your future! Thanks for your prayers!

Snows in December

Welcome to December. The snow is a nice change! TJ wishes it would stay for weeks. The rest of us are glad it's relatively short termed.

We're kind of wrapping up the details of Charlie's estate. There are some terribly lagging details: the title of the car is more difficult than we expected; please pray for an expedited process. We still have decisions to make about some of Charlie's "stuff" too.

Sue's mom is more a focus of our attentions now. She's still at home, still has 24-hour in-home care, and it's still expensive. Sue is finding means to pay for it; her mom has no idea how hard her daughter is working on her behalf! Sue is wonderful! She's wrestling with reverse mortgage details, government agency obstacles, bank bureaucracies, and still maintaining a family, a job and a life! She's so cool!

We've nearly finished cleaning up from the fallen tree; there remain but a few details. The most daunting will be to finish raking up all the leaves (under the snow, before they kill the grass), but those aren't huge issues. I've submitted the claim to the insurance company, and now we're praying for a quick and easy resolution.

Corrie is wrestling with finding the will of God (and the provision of God) in Germany. Boy, that's familiar! Josiah is wrestling with the changes from "adolescence" to "adulthood." That's a rough transition for anyone! TJ is working hard to finish high school; she's been asked to apply for a job in her idea of heaven: the local library, so we're praying for favor there!

Thanks for your prayers. You rock!

Home Again

We're back in Olympia. We have some recommendations to make:

· If you need to go to Los Angeles, fly, don’t drive. It’s a honkin’ long drive! Two days at 9 or 10 hours a day.

· If you have to drive, drive something comfortable. You’ll be sitting for a long time.

· And drive with someone you love: you’ll be spending a long time with them.

· If you have to tow something, use a truck with a diesel engine if you can. We’ve been so impressed with this truck (my dad’s) on this trip.

· Time your drive to miss the Portland rush hour. Dang! They know how to have traffic jams!

· Redding is a great place to stop as a halfway point. It’s almost exactly halfway between Olympia and LA, and there’s a wonderful church there.

· There’s a coffee shop in the church’s lobby that makes great coffee. They have this five-shot thing called Nancy Cobb’s Barnburner or something. That’ll put hair on your chest. You probably want to make sure you want hair on your chest first.

· It’s wonderful to travel with the grace of God. His presence is really cool, and all kinds of problems almost happen instead of actually happen.

So we’re home. We have missed our kids, and we’ve already had several sock fights. My son was remarkably eager to install the larger TV into the living room with the video games and the DVD player. My daughter the craftsperson is excited about the tools and supplies we brought home – and almost went into apoplexy over the gold leaf!

We have a lot of work to do with the things from the estate. We have even more to do to help Sue’s mom deal with her finances. She really has spent all she has on staying in her home, and we’re working on other options now, mostly other options for her to stay at home, not a group home of some sort. She’s definitely getting stronger, but – contrary to her own perceptions – she is not getting strong enough to be on her own again. That could be an interesting conversation when she thinks she’s strong enough to be on her own, and nobody else sees it that way. . .

She’s also recovering from another infection, a doozie that’s resistant to all oral antibiotics, so she’s going to the hospital every day for a week to get her antibiotics intravenously.

We’re also praying for more people to help with the care-giving so Sue doesn’t have to respond to every little thing every time something is out of the normal. She’s pretty worn out.

It seems that FeedBurner isn’t sending out my updates recently, and hasn’t been for a little while. You might visit the website for the last few posts. I’ll send these out manually until I have a chance to figure that beastie out.

You’re a wonderful blessing!

David